I recently read How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. It was a compelling book and it was about time I got around to reading it.
This short post is my compilation of notes on key points from the book.
General Interactions
- Give people good reputations to live up to
- Avoid criticism - seldom produces positive results and makes you look bad
- Birthday book - DC kept a book with people’s birthday’s notated. Get in touch with people on these days
- Before meeting someone, read up on a subject in which they are interested
- Smile
- Talk in terms of others interest not your own
- Remember names!
- Always make the other person feel important
- Always avoid the acute angle in discussion
- Suit the bait for the fish
- Begin with sincere praise, then critize. No “BUTs”
- Dramatize your facts
Disagreements/Arguments
- When challenged but you think you are correct, “I may be wrong, I frequently am, let’s examine the facts”
- Admit when wrong quickly and emphatically
- Avoid arguments like the plague
- Emphasize points of agreement
- Get the other person to say “Yes, Yes”
- Think always from the other person’s point of view
- Appeal to nobler motives
- “I don’t blame you. If I was you, I’d feel as frustrated and bothered as you”